Sunday, 24 July 2016
Hey It's Okay...To Not Be Okay
For those who read this blog regularly, you’ll know I’m a big advocate of ‘good vibes only.’ I practice it daily, my Insta feed is full of inspirational quotes and it’s not often I’m not walking on cloud nine. But whilst I live 99% of my life sunny side up, I’m also a practical soul too. Sh!t happens, on the daily. And whilst I like to never let get things get to me or those around me, sometimes you just gotta let it in and say ‘hey it’s okay…to not be okay.’
Not allowing yourself to have ‘off days’ or making space to feel the pain you’re avoiding or to gloss over part of your life you want to forget will bite you in the ass eventually. It’ll build up until one day you’ll feel like your whole world is crashing down. And that’s not cool. Feelings good or bad are what life is all about. We’re meant to feel, our hearts are meant to experience elation, heartbreak, warmth and cold too. Heartbreak isn’t a fun emotion, but it’s part of the healing process. The sooner you address it, the sooner you can move on, physically and more importantly, mentally.
I’m not saying it’ll go away, you’re only human and part of you will always remember the hurt, you just become better at hiding it or day by day the hurt dissolves slowly. But it’s the scars that make you who you are. They build on your story, give you character and experience is an important teacher.
John Green hit the nail on the head by saying how “when people try to minimize your pain, they are doing you a disservice. And when you try to minimize your pain you’re doing yourself a disservice. Don’t do that. The truth is that it hurts because it’s real. It hurts because it mattered. And that’s an important thing to acknowledge to yourself. But that doesn’t mean it won’t end, it won’t get better. Because it will.”
And Demi Lovato is a wise one too. “Life can be difficult at times but fighting through the pain is so worth it. I’d rather feel every kind of emotion than not feel at all.” Never let life or people in your life strip you of emotion. Don’t let negative experiences turn you into a negative soul. Sure, switching off and not caring may be easy but it’s also pretty damn hollow. Feelings are how you know you’re alive and heck we’re lucky to be here at all. But every now and then, cut yourself some slack, cry your pretty heart out, run away for a few days, turn your phone off, have a duvet day - and come to terms with what you’re feeling. Because it really is okay to not be okay.