There's a slim chance you'll read this title and think me a liar. That's okay. The old me would agree. The old me failed to feel happiness the way I do now, she didn't really go out or open herself up to people but that's a closed door now. This post however, is about regret.
If you go all official and Oxford Dictionary it, you'll get: "A feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over an occurrence or something that one has done or failed to do." That sounds pretty grim if you ask me. I'm not asking you to give up regret completely because life is about balance after all. What I am saying, is think of it a little differently.
No matter your age, it's never too late to start over. Use your regrets to strengthen you but never see them as mistakes. Because I'll let you in on a little secret, whatever choices you make - good or bad, it's exactly what you wanted at that time. And life's too damn short to regret anything your soul wants or wanted. That's your calling and despite people advising you to favour your head over your heart, who wants to get to the end of their life and say they let their head decide everything?
I don't have some people in my life that 5 years ago were my everything. And whilst I could cry a thousand tears because of that, I don't, because I think myself so bloody lucky that fate crossed our paths in the first place. Be thankful rather than regretful. Find the silver lining, elevate the pros and not the cons.
I have a friend and I hope if she reads this, she won't mind me writing about her. She married recently and sadly got divorced a year following. It didn't work out and whilst I'm sure it wasn't easy to brush under the carpet, I think I'm right in saying she probably didn't regret it or think it a mistake, otherwise she'd have never have married him in the first place. She came back better, stronger and wiser because of it. I don't believe she looks upon the years they spent together with a shudder. Use those experiences to learn and come back fighting. Letting regret in is letting life win. Don't.
Not everyone or every chapter of your life is meant to make it 'til the end. My, that would be a boring story. Some are and some chapters will be darker to read than others. Some will bring tears to your eyes but embrace that too. Life's about feeling and pain is inevitable. As A.A. Milne once wrote: "How lucky am I to have someone that makes saying goodbye so hard?" I'd be worried if you didn't have memories or people that bring that out in you. No bestseller glided into the charts with a monotone plot.
Sure, there's moments that I think 'hell, that wasn't your finest moment Stacey' but I don't regret them, well maybe for a few days but then I bounce back, usually after a pep talk or a glass of champagne. Your actions reflect your feelings, and at the end of the day babe, you're only human. And you should never ever apologise for how you feel.
Despite my grey Instagram, my life is colourful. It's amazing, surreal, fun, heartbreaking, sad, happy, confused and every other descriptive word I can think of. And I don't regret a single second of it, or anyone I've ever met or anything I've ever done. Life's too short to wish anything away and I want to make the most of mine, and I hope you do the same.