Step one of CGS: admit you’ve got CGS. And for those not in the know of quite what the heck I’m going on about - it stands for Crazy Girl Syndrome. Or to not be sexist here, Crazy Guy Syndrome. A quick Google of it will define it as: “The phenomenon where girls act irrationally because of their insecurities” or “where outwardly great females - beautiful, smart, funny, seemingly confident turn into neurotic, psycho bitches who shamelessly obsess over typically unworthy guys for far longer than they should."
When my friend first suggested I write this post I was a bit anxious. Because I don’t feel like I omit CGS. If any, I have cut-off syndrome where a seemingly normal girl ignores/and/or cuts off people at any given time. Okay so I wrote that definition but you get my drift. But, what good a writer would I be if I ran for the hills at the first sign of a challenge? So out of my comfort zone I go and into the world of CGS.
Some case study CGS for you, because you know, I’ve got to back up my argument with some IRL instances. Take Elle Woods from Legally Blonde - she goes to Harvard Law school to follow her recent ex boyfriend to prove to him she’s smart enough to be loved. That ain’t okay. Or how about Jules from My Best Friend’s Wedding. She realises only after her guy BFF Michael gets engaged to Cameron Diaz just how much she loves him and spends the whole film trying to destroy their relationship. I love Julia Roberts, but that takes effort.
Okay, okay so the above may have been exaggerated by Hollywood but CGS is real. Maybe you’ve named dropped a guy into conversation to see if the jealous bug bites? Or questioned just what in god’s name he’s doing active on Facebook when he’s read your WhatsApp but not replied? How about that time you uploaded a photo of you with another guy just to test the waters? Or felt some internal glee when he’s been offline for 7 hours but the minute you message - oh hello you.
Are we a little crazy? Or is social media to blame? I’m not sure ghosting was as strong in 1927 as it is today. And twenty years ago you didn’t anxiously wait for the blue double tick to know if bae* was ignoring you. Or how about the triple dot of fear when it goes from in motion to non-existent? WHAT WERE YOU TYPING? DON’T BACKTRACK NOW.
It’s funny how you can send your best friend 13 messages in a row, give her 4 missed calls and even turn up outside her house and no judgement is made, yet do that to a guy and you do look a little cuckoo. Similarly it’s A-Okay to question who your BFF was with yesterday at 11:37am because you saw her upload a brunch shot of poached eggs and avocado onto Instagram, yet question him on that and he’ll probably move cities the next day.
Humour aside, I’m going to stick up for CGS. Providing it’s lighthearted, what the hell! As my friend quite rightly said: “I’d rather give everything to it and look a little full on” than to not show interest at all. The right person will find it flattering that you care so much. We are human at the end of the day. Feelings aren’t the enemy. And the right person will get that. Steer on the right side though. Better an ‘oops than a what if’ and as Marilyn Monroe once famously said: “If you can’t handle me at my worst then you don’t deserve me at my best.” Because whilst any of us that do suffer from CGS wouldn’t want bae to pick up on it, if he can’t be man enough to handle your feelings, guess what - he’s not good enough for you.
*Most of this article is written in sarcastic tone. I hate the word bae.